Dear Stomach et al,

Why? Why must you be so insistent on being so ouch, despite Pepto Bismol's, Advil's, and Powerade's best efforts to sooth you and put the ouch to rest? I need to be able to go to class, and you have been making this very difficult for me. You throw big ol' tantrums that make me completely and utterly miserable, and then you pretend for moments that you are all normal.

Stop being such a drama queen. That's MY job.

~boo